The Suicide Sanctuary

Oh God, why do I always blog when I have something to rant about!  Work is pants today – phone problems/IT problems – recruitment was such a joy when candidates would just pop into the office and you did not have to rely on modern technology! FML is the saying of the week in this office.

I started working when I was fifteen years old at a Tax Office (of all places) as a Clerical Assistant.  I would get the bus every day at the end of my road at 7.45am. I felt very safe and secure as the roads were busy and there was usually plenty of people around. One day, a man in a white van pulled up outside the bus stop. He reversed closer to where I stood, jumped into the back of the van, knocked on the window to get my attention then proceeded to toss himself off. I had never seen a penis before. All I remember was that it was purple. I was so embarrassed and turned the other way; he then turned his vehicle around and shook his willy at me having so much fun playing with himself as I nearly died of shock. I asked myself: Do I run home or will he catch me and rape me, kidnap me or kill me? Or do I just wait for the bus, which as usual was late. I decided that I should wait at the bus stop as it was on a main road and there were plenty of cars around that I could flag down if I needed to. I was so mortified. I never told my parents or any of my friends for a long time.  I feel guilty about this, as this man could have continued stalking young girls in this way. He may have taken things further. If this is the case, could I have prevented this? What about now – thirty years on – do I report this man? He was probably in his mid-twenties, had dark hair in that trendy wedge/DA hair cut that was fashionable in the mid-eighties.  I knew where he worked. It was a shop in town. (I daren’t say more at this stage).  I am on a Molesey Facebook page and other people have also mentioned a flasher from our home town.  Do I take action all these years on when so many mature “gentlemen” in the press, such as Jimmy Saville have been exposed as evil and twisted?  This world truly can be a sick place.  

I don’t watch Corrie at the moment as it is in the middle of trying to get Charlotte to settle down to bed in the middle of a ton of housework. I have heard the story of the death of Hayley Cropper. I once met the actress who played her, at apartments we stayed at in Devon for New Year.  I even found myself staring at her in the pool/Jacuzzi to see if she had a Willy! Doh! What a lovely, kind and sincere person and wonderful mother. She was very friendly and nothing like the character she played – in looks or personality.  Suicide and assisted suicide is such a delicate subject. I think it should be allowed without having to travel to Switzerland and die in an undignified way in a dingy flat.  One of my business ideas (with the help of friends) is to open “The Suicide Sanctuary” or “Gateway to Heaven” – this will offer counselling, prayers and support and be a beautiful spa, making the experience of death beautiful.